Disclaimer: I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice. If anything written triggers a sympathetic response, see your doctor or mental health advisor.
I think it’s time to trim the fat. With over 100 departments and agencies, and over 300,000 government employees, the government of Canada has become morbidly obese. The individual organs have deteriorated through misuse and need to be excised. Even the asshole is deformed from too much paristaltic activity.
The asshole-in-question Crime Minister is appointed by the asshole-in-charge Sitting Monarch, supposedly due to overwhelming approval by the people but not necessarily. The office of Prime Minister is .....
“Not outlined in any constitutional document, the office exists only per long-established convention.” https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prime_Minister_of_Canada
We don’t vote for him/her/it directly. Whatever party is elected in the various ridings adds to the votes for the party itself. Example, my vote (if I voted) for the Libtards in my neighbourhood would count as a vote for the Party of Libtards. If I don’t like the actions of the Libtards in my neighbourhood and I want the Preservatives here, my vote for them would put the Preservatives in power in Ottawa. If I want a certain asshole in charge Crime Minister, I have to vote that party at my level whether I want them or not.
Stupid, I know.
In the meantime, the future wannabe asshole-in-question Crime Minister needs to be in the right spot at the right time to be chosen by the people selected for the position.
So, the colon Governor General (him/her/itself appointed by the asshole in charge Sitting Monarch on recommendation by the asshole in question Crime Minister) moves the wannabe asshole-in-question Crime Minister-in-waiting over to the paristalsis Privy Council then picks him out of the crowd and appoints him the asshole in question Twoo Crime Minister.
Circular logic???
Then comes the intestines Cabinet, who are appointed by the asshole-in-charge Sitting Monarch on recommendation from the asshole-in-question Crime Minister. They are usually promoted from within the stomach House of Commons but might come from the liver Senate. (and you’ll not believe who appoints the liver Senate! But more on that later) I say “usually promoted” but the MotherWEFers brag about infiltrating Canada’s cabinet by more than 50%....
The intestines Cabinet make up part of the paristalsis (shit mover) Privy Council. These guys are the rats who tattle to the asshole-in-charge Sitting Monarch and come back to do the dirty work. Hmm, I wonder if the “Privy Council” pun was intended??
Now we come to the liver Senate, swollen and diseased from separating the good stuff that comes in and turning it into the shit that moves along and out the asshole-in-question Crime Minister’s mouth. Said liver Senate is appointed by the colon Governor General on recommendation by the asshole-in-question Crime Minister. More circular logic. An appointment to the liver Senate used to be a life sentence but, since 1965, they are forcible paroled at age 75.
The liver Senate approves or vetoes bills coming from the stomach House of Commons so these appointees outrank the voted-in reps. Go figure. The stomach House of Commons is bloated at 338 representatives voted in by the various electoral districts (ridings) in Canada. Supposedly the more populace ridings get more seats at the table for some reason. These elected reps have a term of four years so they need to work for their position or not get re-elected.
These two elderly pieces of diseased anatomy, the liver Senate and the stomach House of Commons, together make up part of the intestinal tract Parliament. And you’ll never guess how they do a turnover of Parliament during election time. The colon Governor General dissolves the intestines Parliament on the advice of the asshole-in-question Crime Minister. Dissolves Parliament. Except it’s only the voted-in-by-the-people stomach House of Commons that gets ousted, the fatty and diseased liver Senate that was appointed by the colon Governor General as advised by the asshole-in-question Crime Minister stays wedded until death do them part...or 75 whichever comes first.
Side note that makes me laugh every time: the colon Governor General (remember recommended by asshole-in-question Crime Minister) can also dissolve the intestines Parliament (but only the duly elected) in the case of a no confidence vote. But.....
The House of Commons, but not the Senate, can be dissolved at any time by the King of Canada or by Governor General on the advice of the prime minister. If the government is refused confidence or supply, the prime minister must either resign and permit another member of the House of Commons to form a government, or else advise the governor general to dissolve Parliament. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dissolution_of_parliament#Canada
So the asshole-in-question needs to say he has no confidence in himself and that the colon needs to dissolve the intestinal tract so a new asshole can be formed. And go figure that will ever happen!
All the way at the bottom of the pyramid, we have the over 100 Ministries, Departments and Agencies and 300,000 Civil Servants - and that’s just Federal. Not to mention all the Provincial, Municipal, City Councils and all their Civil Servants. https://www.tbs-sct.canada.ca/ems-sgd/edb-bdd/index-eng.html#igoc/portfolio
There are 137 distinct organizations within the Public Service, including 23 miniserial (line) departments, 3 service agencies, 17 departmental corporations, 50 departmental agencies, 12 special operating agencies, and 6 agents of Parliament.
Like I said, Canada’s government is morbidly obese. Swollen, distended, diseased with parts that can’t fulfill their purpose because of the vast overwhelming amount of shit being pushed through. So what to do about it? I say we need a total transplant done, with very few parts able to be surgically salvaged.
Grassroots, bottom up, merit driven.
The most comprehensive and accurate breakdown of our political system I've ever had the pleasure of reading! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
🤣🤪🤣
I second Toxicanadian on this. I applaud the rigorous scientific accuracy of the diagnosis and remedy.